The Gem Witch

Five months of sobriety. 

Five months of clarity.

Five months of healing.

Sobriety is my spellwork; intention, reflection, & rebirth.

Sobriety has become my ritual.

It hasn’t been easy, but it’s been worth every single moment. 

I no longer run from my shadows; I honor them.

I choose peace, not chaos. 

I choose me, over & over again. 

Each day I grow a little stronger.

A little more resilient.

I’m not who I was & I’m proud of that. 

In my twenties I was nearly eight years sober. I got sober in rehab when I was twenty-two. Then when I turned thirty, the same month of my birthday, I relapsed. I had a vacation planned to Belize & I didn’t want to experience it sober. Why would I go to another country & not drink a mango marg on a tropical island? Tf. 

That was also the time I decided at that point I didn’t want kids anymore, after a lifetime of dreams yearning to be a Mom. I grew up in a household shadowed by addiction. My parents were only around when they were drunk. I thought their chaos was normal. I fell into that cycle myself, the same pain.

When I got sober the first time, I promised myself my kids would never live the life I did. I wanted them to grow up surrounded by love & acceptance, not confusion & neglect. So, at thirty, when I decided I didn’t want kids anymore, who fucking cared? 

I relapsed for exactly three years. 

Three years in a fog. 

Three years of missing memories. 

I’d black out & get myself into trouble. By the time I quit drinking this last time I was taking twelve shots a day, nearly every day. I craved alcohol constantly, I went to the liquor store often. My drug of choice was Crown & Monaco’s, but truthfully, I’d drink anything.

At some point, I started asking myself, who am I?

& I realized I didn’t want to be that person anymore. 

I remembered the version of me who felt most alive, the one who was sober & deeply connected to her spirituality. I still practiced paganism & witchcraft through those dark years, but I wasn’t connecting to spirit the way I used to be. The deeper I get into sobriety, the more I connect to spirit. 

Spirituality means everything to me. 

Here’s to five months of light, truth, & becoming. Magick in the making.

Blessed be. ✨

💛 Ave